Mumps Mumps Mumps

[reuber1]

http://www.webmd.com/content/article/120/113902.htm

Looks like Iowa, particularly Eastern Iowa, and several other neighboring states, has had a 730% increase in mumps cases so far this year. Yipee!!! Lucky me, one of my co-workers' wife works at a local hospital where, un-awesomely, has been in direct contact with at least 6 carriers.

My favorite quote from that article:
"We don't know why this is occurring," CDC spokeswoman Lola Russell tells WebMD. That quote will be running through my head while my testicles swell to the size of basketballs.

[ecsyle]

Christ man, keep an eye on your balls.

[balou]

Isn't there a vaccination?

[reuber1]

From what I've heard, it has mutated so that the MMR vaccine is ineffective.

[morea]

holy cow, quarantine yourself! I recommend at least one month, if not two, on Booby Island.

[balou]

In that case, what ec said. :eek: How is it transmitted? Airborn or surface?

[cjoe]

My mumps, my mumps my mumps mumps!

[ecsyle]

Lovely lady mumps?


what?

[cjoe]

Lovely lady mumps?


what?

No i'm not drunk. But I have no idea why i posted that. lol.

[AlexNJ210]

well thats not good. Thats not a fun sickness. Whats going on nationally about this

[ecsyle]

Pssh, i am drunk. Everyone else should be too. ITS TUESDAY! WOO!

[reuber1]

From Time magazine, "How Iowa Got the Mumps":

"...although the outbreaks appears to have started in college-age adults, the latest information shows that mumps is now striking people ages 2 to 80. What's really puzzling about the Iowa outbreak is that most of the victims seem to have been fully vaccinated. Among those whose medical history has been confirmed, two-thirds got both of the required doses of MMR."

Funny, the picture in the article is of one of the medical testing facilities here in Dubuque. We're right in the middle, baby!

[reuber1]

Oh, and it's a 720% increase, not 730. My bad.

As far as how it's transmitting, that's what they are trying to find out. They are seeing if there is a link between the 43,000 plus who were sick in England and Wales last year. Apparently they have similar genetic makeup.

[morea]

that's a ridiculously large increase. Damn.

[Mynock]

We need to get this under wraps. We should napalm bomb Iowa. I see several good reasons why we should.
#1. It's Iowa.
#2. Keep the killer mumps from spreading.
#3. With the popcorn created by the heat we could feed the impoverished around the nation.

[rickself]

George W will come in and use NUCULAR heat instead of napalm.

[reuber1]

In that case, what ec said. :eek: How is it transmitted? Airborn or surface?Probably surface, and by surface I mean college kids screwing. Yeah, it took me that long to think of that.

[morea]

eew. What a sticky situation.

:eek:

[reuber1]

There's four private colleges in town, two community colleges in the area, so that doesn't surprise me. And think of where all of these kids come from...there's a shatload from Florida, I know that much. So when these kids go back home, they could be bringing back a gift!

Which makes me wonder, what would possess kids from Florida to come to Eastern Iowa to a non-state university? The schools here are expensive.

[reuber1]

http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/ap/health/3793276.html

"Although the highest concentration of cases remained in eastern Iowa..."

Isn't that all kinds of awesome.

[Mynock]

Two words. Nuc Ular!

[paulrandfan]

ugh...heard about that on the news....weird.

[Jeizzavelle]

Christ man, keep an eye on your balls.
Reminded me of Office Space "Watch your cornhole, man" :D

[JPnyc]

Ah whats a little swollen face? So you'll look like a hamster who just ate for a bit, so what?

[reuber1]

Mumps is a virus-caused illness spread by coughing and sneezing. The most common symptoms are fever, headache and swollen salivary glands under the jaw. But it can lead to more severe problems, such as hearing loss, meningitis and fertility-diminishing swollen testicles.That's what.

[morea]

bah, you didn't want to reproduce anyway, did you? Just cause you're infertile doesn't mean you can't use your equipment.

[reuber1]

Good point. :cool:

[Kool]

Mumps is a virus-caused illness spread by coughing and sneezing. The most common symptoms are fever, headache and swollen salivary glands under the jaw. But it can lead to more severe problems, such as hearing loss, meningitis and fertility-diminishing swollen testicles.

That's what.

Yeah but from what I gather from that other thread you're not really using them much, so again what's the big deal. :D

[Jeizzavelle]

Plus if you get a bad case of "irish balls" (all taters and no meat) your ding looks little(r)

[reuber1]

Yeah but from what I gather from that other thread you're not really using them much, so again what's the big deal. :DHa ha, I walked right into that one. :D

Who says I'm not using them, just not with the same person? ;)

[morea]

he could still be using em, what's up for debate is whether anyone ELSE is using em. :p

[Jeizzavelle]

Oh, no! That was great! High five Morea!

[reuber1]

Hardy har har. Pervert.

[Mynock]

he could still be using em, what's up for debate is whether anyone ELSE is using em. :pOh Snap!

[morea]

heehee... sorry reuber.

*returns high fives when reuber isn't looking*

[morea]

only teasing of course, reuber. But you know that.

(((HUG))) ;)

[AlexNJ210]

^^^^^distanced hug/pat on the back^^^^^^

[morea]

they're talking about your mumps on the local news tonight reuber. It has spread to 8 other states.

[reuber1]

Boy, good ol' presidential elections and health crises are great for Iowan attention! I forgot what the total count is in our county, which is considered the host county, but I thought it alone was in the 600 range. I've had my vaccination a while ago, but needless to say I'm avoiding contact from others for a while. When Gov. Vilsack met with Bush not too long ago, I don't even think this was discussed (incidentally, neither was the tornado damage in Iowa City...that place got ravaged).

[Samakimoto Graphics]

Ah whats a little swollen face? So you'll look like a hamster who just ate for a bit, so what?

I remember having the mumps, I had Dandy jaws, You could see them from the back of me sticking out the sides:p :p, Must've been round 6 or 7 years old...

[rickself]

Mumps

Lovely Mummmps! Wonderful Mummmps!
Lovely Mummmps! Wonderful Mumps.

Mum-m-m-m-m-m-m-ps.
Mum-m-m-m-m-m-m-ps.
Mum-m-m-m-m-m-m-ps.
Mum-m-m-m-m-m-m-ps.


Lovely Mummmps! (Lovely Mumps!)
Lovely Mummmps! (Lovely Mumps!)
Lovely Mummmps!

Mummmps, Mummmps, Mummmps, Mummmmmps!
(with apologies to Monty Python)

[morea]

I've got a luvverly bunch of coca-mumps, diddly dee dee
there they are all standing in a row...
big ones, small ones, some as big as your head!