Bad boys or Nice guys?

[reuber1]

Remember the Curvey or Skinny article from a month or two ago? Well, let's put a spin on that topic and give one for the ladies. I saw this article when I went to look through what remains of my Hotmail inbox:

http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=6126&TrackingID=516311&BannerID=562427&menuid=6&GT1=7964

...and was wondering what other people's take is on this. Girls/ladies, do you like the nice guys more, or do you dig the mystery of the bad boy? Sometimes it's just a mystery to us: you like these sappy stories like the Notebook or whatever, but I can't count how many times in the past I've seen a girl that I dug who seemed really cool and had her proverbial shit together dating some guy who is a total ass hole (don't censor me, forum).

This is my first poll thread I have posted, BTW. :D

[Satchel]

I'm not gonna vote cuz I'm not a lady, but I already know the answer... BAD BOYS... speaking from a nice guy that usually finishes last!

[morea]

I vote nice guys.

[twogun]

I'm not gonna vote cuz I'm not a lady, but I already know the answer... BAD BOYS... speaking from a nice guy that usually finishes last!

aaaaah satch mate! manly hug!!!! i gonna vote for you.....

there, here's to Satchel!!!! hoorraahhh

[Satchel]

aaaaah satch mate! manly hug!!!! i gonna vote for you.....

there, here's to Satchel!!!! hoorraahhh

haha, thanks twogun... that manley hug is just what I needed :)

[reuber1]

I vote nice guys.How come? I want thoughts people, I want to hear the mysterious female logic! :p

[Kool]

Heh heh, they'll all say nice guys but they won't really mean it. (Except Morea of course) The nice guys end up sitting home on saturday nite and the jerks who treat women like crap will have and endless supply of dates. ;)

[Satchel]

Heh heh, they'll all say nice guys but they won't really mean it. (Except Morea of course) The nice guys end up sitting home on saturday nite and the jerks who treat women like crap will have and endless supply of dates. ;)

amen!

[G-Man79]

You forgot a third option, Reub: Dudes who look like ladies.

On topic, I think my wife once said: Bad boys are fun but they're not marriage material.

I guess that means I'm a nice guy?

[Mynock]

I'm a nice guy who got lucky, in his last year of college to find a nice gal.

[reuber1]

"Dude looks like a' lady"...ahh, Aerosmith blows.

Bad boys are good enough for a late night f'ck, but nice guys are good enough to be married. Then again, I have about as much desire to get married as I do to drive a car full speed into a wall designed to withstand nuclear fallout.

Obviously the ideal is to strike a balance between the two; don't be a p*ssy but don't be an ass as well.

[reuber1]

C'mon ladies, fess up.

[balou]

My guy owned his own house. That's what I looked for. No, not really. I don't think it's all black & white like that - nice/bad. For me it was having a best friend, trust and being able to laugh at himself. Plus a lot of other stuff. It's such and individual thing. I want more than two choices!

[Mynock]

You need a house? I thought all you needed was a sweet car. Hmmm. Maybe that's it Satch.

[reuber1]

That's the fun of this poll. It's one of those two choices. It's the red pill or the blue pill. It's Meat Lovers or Veggies. If I gave an added choice of "Guys who are really cool and are genuine but mysterious at the same time", then it wouldn't be any fun.

[balou]

I figure it was kind of the nest theory. Or more like, if you build it, they will come! LOL! I was really just tired of laundromats & he had a washer & a dryer. :)

And, by the way, if you can't see it, so far is Nice Guys: 3, Bad Boys:1

[reuber1]

But very few explanations that support WHY ladies are picking nice guys. This is usually where I call bull; basically go back to Kool's post.

[Satchel]

You need a house? I thought all you needed was a sweet car. Hmmm. Maybe that's it Satch.

Yeah the sweet car's not doin' much for me on the lady front!

[Mynock]

Satch maybe you need to take them down to the drive through in the cities. I think it's on the south side, dunno I've never been there, but I think theres one there.

[TheBluePanda]

I think the whole 'nice guys/bad boys' thing is garbage. I don't think any mature, professional, career-oriented women is going to want to marry a 'bad boy'. Most of them are going to want somebody who can be a supportive, nurturing spouse. Not run around acting like a jerk.

I think the 'bad boy' types only have fun in the dating world, when single women are looking to live on the wild side. However, at some point they have to grow up and join the real world.

[Satchel]

Satch maybe you need to take them down to the drive through in the cities. I think it's on the south side, dunno I've never been there, but I think theres one there.

Drive-in? I know of one north east of st.paul... vally-hi (or something)

[reuber1]

Panda, are you sure that's so true when women get older? Who says that they still don't want a little mystery then as opposed to when they are younger? Who says that that isn't the real world?

[Satchel]

I've had a couple of girls older than myself as girlfriends one with a kid and she was pretty mature, career-oriented and she left me for some jerk she met... I know I'm still young and two years older than me isn't exactly old but she seemed to be the most level headed out of all my ex's... still chose the bad boy!

[Jeizzavelle]

I voted bad boy but I am in the unique situation of having a tattooed bad boy who is a nice guy. He has 275 tattoos and is biult like a brick $h!thouse but has the heart of a marshmellow. I have found that to usally be the case. But then I am sort of a tattooed freak myself, having 7 tattoos and dying to get more....most nice guys see me and gasp. (just before they run). I think girls like bad boys cause we get sick of hearing "yes dear" all the time and want a guy with a spine. Only we end up with a jerk who tries to take ours. That help you guys any?

[Kool]

So what I'm seeing here is that the ladies want nice guys to stay home, save their money and basically stay available until they get around to looking for a husband. ;)

[Jeizzavelle]

No, see that's the problem with men. We want a man who has a spine!!! Not mine, cause I want to feel like I'm in charge but your own cause if I walk over the top of you all the tim it's just no fun. If I wanted to "be the man" I wouldn't be dating a man.

[Satchel]

Just because you're a nice guy doesn't mean you dont hav a spine... We're talking nice guys not "pussies" There is a difference!

[morea]

well, I did date some royal arse-holes over the years, but they were never fulfilling relationships.

Honestly I appreciate a guy who cares about my feelings as well as his own. I like it when a guy makes a bit of an effort to make me feel special - something as simple as renting a movie I had mentioned I wanted to see or picking up a bottle of my favorite wine (which only runs about $10).

I like someone who makes me feel included, not a guy who will ignore me all the time because something good might be on tv or he's busy playing a video game. (I have no qualms about those things normally, but with some guys it's ALL the time. Hell, if you're going to sit and play a video game, give me the other controller and let me play too!)

"Bad boys" are usually selfish and obnoxious and a lot of them expect women to cater to them and fall all over themselves to "keep" them. They have a tendency to womanize and do stupid, often dangerous things.

And besides, nice guys can be a little "naughty" when they want to. ;)

[TheBluePanda]

Panda, are you sure that's so true when women get older? Who says that they still don't want a little mystery then as opposed to when they are younger? Who says that that isn't the real world?

Of course they love a little mystery, but you don't have to be a bad boy to pull that off.

I think we also have to define 'bad boy', because that term can cover a pretty broad spectrum. It can range from guys that occaisionally curse, all the way to serial murderers.

[morea]

If I wanted to "be the man" I wouldn't be dating a man.

totally true. :D

[balou]

Ah, just be confident and happy with yourself - don't play any games. If you're interested, show interest, if she's interested, she'll show interest. Simple as that.

[reuber1]

Again, the whole point of this topic is to discuss it really, the poll really isn't such the focus. Like I said before, if I start defining everything in the poll, then the answers become obvious. I just wanted to have a discussion engaged about it.

[Jeizzavelle]

"Bad boys" are usually selfish and obnoxious and a lot of them expect women to cater to them and fall all over themselves to "keep" them. They have a tendency to womanize and do stupid, often dangerous things.

Yes. THose are the jerks we don't want/need. I like the fact that if i whisper in Jafo's ear when he's sleeping he smiles. I like it when he brings me flowers (wild or florist type) for no reason. I like how he remembers that I hate icing so when he makes cinnamon rolls he leaves it off some of them. It's the little things that make a nice guy.

[morea]

I completely agree. :)

[reuber1]

OK, devils advocate here.

I've heard from some female friends that if you try to do nice things like that in the beginning, it almost seems like you are trying to be manipulative to try to get into the girls pants. I guess there's no problem with being a true guy when the relationship has already kicked off and you've been around each other long enough to notice that her farts smell horrendous and he keeps toe nail clipping collections and etc., but honestly ladies, it seems like us single guys have to pull an entire act out of our behinds, whether nice or bad, in order to get noticed. Sometimes, "being ourselves" gets us nowhere.

[Jeizzavelle]

"Being ourselves get us nowhere".....True if you're an @-hole

Jafo got me by being NICE. He worked at the same place and when I came out into the shop to get a sign he offered to help me, he said hi when he saw me, he offered me carrots one day and we started talking. Then we started going to lunch. He opened the door for me and paid for my food. Most of all he listened. He didn't do anything he doesn't do now. He didn't act all macho and crap he just was there. He wwas a good friend but made it known to me that he wouldn't object to more. I just looked at him one day and wanted to rip his clothes off. I don't know. He doesn't look like Fabio or anything, he was actually a bit heavy then but it was the NICE that attracted me to him. He kept bringing me carrots cause he knew I liked them and I liked that he thought of me. He bought me a little necklace for my birthday that said someone special. I got mad (the are you trying to get in my pants thing) and he was like NO, I just want you to know you're special to me. I think you're cool. Just be honest and don't la it on too thick, ya know? If you like her try remembering small things like what kinda flowers she likes. Then suprise her a week later with them. It's the little things that matter most! Promise.

[reuber1]

See, I was a nice guy, and that got me nowhere. I've garnered more attention by being a dick than a nice guy, not that I'm proud of that. Maybe you're one of the few women out there that makes some goddamn sense. Maybe it's just the Iowa girls. :confused:

When I say I was a nice guy, I don't mean I was a push-over.

[Satchel]

Maybe it's just the Iowa and Minnesota girls?

[Jeizzavelle]

I see girls like that everywhere. I don't like women because they are 2 faced pains in my ass. A total waste of oxygen. I have always played with the boys (Yall were SO much more fun) and therefore been stuck in the "friend" category so that when the skank dumped them they called me crying. Girls want to be treated like princesses. But they also need to know that if some burly biker guy (Jafo) tried to mug/molest/kill them you'd be able to kick the crap out of them and not break a sweat (see any bad action flick). I don't know why we are so contrary or for craps sake what the attraction is to us but it's there. All I can say is to honestly be yourself. If you, say, go to the bar and see a girl sitting with her buds, do the look over and crap and see if they take notice. If they do and they are not laughing hysterically, then make your move. Normally a girl will let you know. See I am a bit differan t cause if I'm interested I would just walkup and be liek look I saw you staring at my ass all night so let's just get o ut of here and maybe if you're really good I'll let you spank me. Most girls don't do that. All I can say is to lift your skirt, grab your balls and ask her out. Treat her the way you want to be treated and tell her look, don't pile on me cause I'm nice or I'll drive by you hose every night for the next 6 months and pee on your dog.

[balou]

All I can say is to lift your skirt, grab your balls and ask her out.

LOL!

[twogun]

^gosh!!!^

[colonel5]

Maybe it's just the Iowa and Minnesota girls?

yeah the manipulative, selfish, indecisiveness definitely resides in MN ;o)

[Satchel]

See I am a bit differan t cause if I'm interested I would just walkup and be liek look I saw you staring at my ass all night so let's just get o ut of here and maybe if you're really good I'll let you spank me. Most girls don't do that.

Now that's what I'm talkin' about :)

[reuber1]

I see girls like that everywhere. I don't like women because they are 2 faced pains in my ass. A total waste of oxygen. I have always played with the boys (Yall were SO much more fun) and therefore been stuck in the "friend" category so that when the skank dumped them they called me crying. Girls want to be treated like princesses. But they also need to know that if some burly biker guy (Jafo) tried to mug/molest/kill them you'd be able to kick the crap out of them and not break a sweat (see any bad action flick). I don't know why we are so contrary or for craps sake what the attraction is to us but it's there. All I can say is to honestly be yourself. If you, say, go to the bar and see a girl sitting with her buds, do the look over and crap and see if they take notice. If they do and they are not laughing hysterically, then make your move. Normally a girl will let you know. See I am a bit differan t cause if I'm interested I would just walkup and be liek look I saw you staring at my ass all night so let's just get o ut of here and maybe if you're really good I'll let you spank me. Most girls don't do that. All I can say is to lift your skirt, grab your balls and ask her out. Treat her the way you want to be treated and tell her look, don't pile on me cause I'm nice or I'll drive by you hose every night for the next 6 months and pee on your dog.Man, I wish more females had your same point of view.

Oh, BTW, welcome. I didn't notice that you were only at 7 posts. :p

[twogun]

See I am a bit differan t cause if I'm interested I would just walkup and be liek look I saw you staring at my ass all night so let's just get o ut of here and maybe if you're really good I'll let you spank me.

im with you satchel, Jeizzavelle do you ever visit the UK?

[Satchel]

she's got a boyfriend... but do you have any sisters?

[Jeizzavelle]

Oh, thanks. Yeah, I saw the poll and thought I'd just jump right in. Seriously I don't believe in jacking around. If I want something I get it and that's how it is. I just don't see the point in mind games ans other silliness. Either you like me or you don't and I was breating before I met you so I am pretty sure life will go on without you. Some people waste my air and I hate that but if you can manage to weed out the bad ones there is a redneck (Jafo's pet name for me when I do something shocking like flsah my cleavage to get a better deal on our camper or yell at the used car salesman and make him pee down his leg whiile I tell him how much I am going to pay for my car after he fills it with gas) BUT there is a girl out there somewhere who is not a jerk. Surely I am not the only one. Besides, you don't want mme I leave clothes out everywhere and my cat farts.

[twogun]

I do something shocking like flsah my cleavage to get a better deal on our camper.

i love camping dont you satchel?

[Satchel]

Yeah I'm a fan!

[Jeizzavelle]

No, get this I live in a camper. I bought it cause I got tired of the high bills in the house we were renting and we were looking to get one to camp in. I am a redneck woman.

Time for lunch. Back in a flash.

[twogun]

ooohhh, whatt do you do for hoildays then, go housing!!!! LOL

[Satchel]

Back in a flash.

you're all about flashing!

[Jeizzavelle]

Haha you guys are a riot. No wonder the women are beating down your doors.

[Satchel]

^^that wasn't nice!

[Jeizzavelle]

I'm not the one claiming nice. I am the one claiming honest. (Also known as abrupt, short, bitchy, mean...)

[TheBluePanda]

Wow, this thread has been an interesting read. :D

[Satchel]

ahh but just because I'm claiming nice doesn't mean I'm a spineless punk... you do or say something I dont like I will let you know.

[paulrandfan]

I skimmed the rest of the pages, so hopefully I won't be too off topic in my reply.

1. Isn't there a drive through east of the twin cities in Cottage Grove still. I grew up with that one...and I'd be horrified and saddened to learn it was destroyed.

2. On boys. I'm an odd case. I have one female friend and the rest of them are male (for those of you who don't see me around much, I am female).

I like the mixture of a good boy and a bad boy. If a guy is too "good" he's more likely to put up with my crap, and believe me I'm the first to admit I can be a difficult person to be around. I need someone who is going to hold me to account just as much as I need someone who is going to love me, respect me and treat me nicely as a "good guy" too. I also like the guy who's a little reserved. I like feeling that I know a piece of him that no one else knows.

Because my interests/hobby is automotive-related, I tend to get the guys who have a little bit of an edge, and that excites me.

Futhermore a guy who is super nice and attentive and sensitive straight off...makes me suspicious. A guy who is too excited to be with me, makes me wonder what the hell is wrong with him, lol. I'm not trying to be self depricating but that's the truth.

All in all, I like a little mystery, but I still like someone who cuddles, and I have that:)

[Jeizzavelle]

That's the kind of thing girls like...unless you go on somoe testosterone fueled manpage. Ugh, can't stand those.

[balou]

What I find interesting is the previous thread was titled "Curvey vs Skinny". And this one is "Bad vs Nice".

[Jeizzavelle]

I skimmed the rest of the pages, so hopefully I won't be too off topic in my reply.

1. Isn't there a drive through east of the twin cities in Cottage Grove still. I grew up with that one...and I'd be horrified and saddened to learn it was destroyed.

2. On boys. I'm an odd case. I have one female friend and the rest of them are male (for those of you who don't see me around much, I am female).

I like the mixture of a good boy and a bad boy. If a guy is too "good" he's more likely to put up with my crap, and believe me I'm the first to admit I can be a difficult person to be around. I need someone who is going to hold me to account just as much as I need someone who is going to love me, respect me and treat me nicely as a "good guy" too. I also like the guy who's a little reserved. I like feeling that I know a piece of him that no one else knows.

Because my interests/hobby is automotive-related, I tend to get the guys who have a little bit of an edge, and that excites me.

Futhermore a guy who is super nice and attentive and sensitive straight off...makes me suspicious. A guy who is too excited to be with me, makes me wonder what the hell is wrong with him, lol. I'm not trying to be self depricating but that's the truth.

All in all, I like a little mystery, but I still like someone who cuddles, and I have that:)

As a tomboy/redneck/doesn't play well with other but can hold her own with the biys AMEN!!
I am SO not a priss and hate to be coddled but do want to be cuddled. And if I am the best thing that has ever happened to you, then you need a life.

[Satchel]

What I find interesting is the previous thread was titled "Curvey vs Skinny". And this one is "Bad vs Nice".
guys are shallow - girls are crazy ;)

[Jeizzavelle]

Curvy vs Skinny and Bad vs Nice....men are (proven fact) visually stimulated more than women.

[balou]

I like white teeth and caloused hands.

[Satchel]

I like white teeth and caloused hands.

haha, all my construction working friends make fun of my soft hands.

[Jeizzavelle]

caloused hands mean he works hard (no offense it's the way we think) and give visions of sweat and sleeveless flannel......ok, I needed a minute (J/K) But anyhoo caloused hand also feel good because WOMEN are physical. That's why when you want to roll over and sleep we want to be cuddled. Touch us and we feel closer to you. That's why women get emotionally involved quicker too.

[Satchel]

caloused hands mean he works hard (no offense it's the way we think)

Just because that's the way you think doesn't mean I cant be offended. I work hard too, just with my mind instead of my muscles... I am particularlly touchy about this because all my dumb oaf friends that never graudated high school always give me crap because they work a "man's job" and I dont! psh!

[balou]

Um, I'll skip on the sweat and sleeveless flannel. *hits head to knock out vision of Larry the Cable Guy*

[Satchel]

well this was fun but I'm off to lunch then a little training course - have fun!

[Jeizzavelle]

I know. I was just trying to help you follow the thought process. I wasn't saying it was right. I would much rather have a guy who can tie his own shoes than some knuckle dragging moron.
BUT it all goes back to the dark alley threory. You can't send a thug a computer virus and wipe him out. IF you don't have obvious physical strength she is going to be less atracted to you right away. You just have to work a little harder.

[Mynock]

I have baby soft hands, and my clothes smell like a clean baby, so my gal says.

[Jeizzavelle]

OOh. Guys who smell good are the best. We like rolling onto your pillow (that's where all the drool comes from) and smelling you or your laundry or hugging you and smelling the scent that it YOU. Letting her borrow you coat works, too.

[Mynock]

We're five hours apart and sometimes when I visit I forget a shirt or two and she loves it. She'll wear them sometimes until she washes them.

[Jeizzavelle]

We're five hours apart and sometimes when I visit I forget a shirt or two and she loves it. She'll wear them sometimes until she washes them.
Study him guys, his words are your bible. Everything he has said is PERFECT!

[balou]

Mynock, did you hear that? You are the standard all men should live by!

[twogun]

i'm married, i leave a shirt behind for my wife, she then wishes we were 5 hours apart!!!

[Jeizzavelle]

According to one female but they think I am *cough* perfect (they haven't metbeen farted on by my cat yet)
Jafo leaves his socks behind. We live together and they ar always in the way. But very effective at killing the smell of cat farts and the cat.

[Mynock]

Mynock, did you hear that? You are the standard all men should live by!For the longest time I was in the same boat as Satch. I dated, and pursued with no luck. I quit caring, and like two years later I made moves on my fiance. We knew of each other, but didn't know each other that well. We worked together, but in different buildings (she was an RA in one and me ARHD in another). She asked me to join her bowling team, and I still didn't make a move until I heard her complaining about boys one night. The light went on and realized unlike all the other times she wasn't "taken." I needed a kick in the butt. She's been the only one I've really had as a girlfriend, and was 22 at the time. I think I was babblin' there, but I think you get my point. If not, I can try to explain myself better.

[Jeizzavelle]

That's what I mean. I'm sure somewhere (maybe even in this forum) there is a group of lonely girls whining about "why don't men want to stay with me? Why do they want to lead me on till they run off with Bambi form the topless bar?...." There are nice girls out there but they have been burned too. So just be cautious and wade through the losers and eventually you will find someone. I think it's important to be yourself though cause women are on to the putting on an act thing and we look for cracks in your armor. If you're not really like the way you are acting we will be mad.

[balou]

Isn't there a drive through east of the twin cities in Cottage Grove still. I grew up with that one...and I'd be horrified and saddened to learn it was destroyed.

It's still there. :)

[reuber1]

The Bad vs. Nice and Curvey vs. Skinny was total coincidence

[morea]

I see girls like that everywhere. I don't like women because they are 2 faced pains in my ass.

Unfortunately, lots of them are like that - those are the ones you nice guys want to run from. :eek: At the place I used to work I was constantly pulling daggers out of my back... but fortunately, not ALL women are like that.

A friend of mine explained it to me this way... a lot of girls have self esteem issues. They don't have a sense of their own value, and need to find ways to prove to themselves that they have worth. Subconsciously they feel that if they can "tame" a bad boy, it means that they are important and have value as a human being.

I'm sure somewhere (maybe even in this forum) there is a group of lonely girls whining about "why don't men want to stay with me? Why do they want to lead me on till they run off with Bambi form the topless bar?...." There are nice girls out there but they have been burned too.

no kidding!

The whole nice guy/bad boy debate isn't really a "fair" assessment of women.

Tell me that guys aren't doing the same thing when they are drooling over (girls who act like / dress like / earn a living as) strippers even though they want a "nice girl" to take home to mom.

If a person is looking for a RELATIONSHIP, they usually look for a nice person who treats them well and cares about them. If they are looking for something to "play with," bring on the Barbie dolls and the Fonz.

[Jeizzavelle]

LMAO at the new avatar Mynock! Too cute, I love Stuey. He reminds me of my 3 yr old. (He'll be 4 in a little over a week and we call him Napolean cause he's the world's smallest dictator.)

[reuber1]

Tell me that guys aren't doing the same thing when they are drooling over (girls who act like / dress like / earn a living as) strippers even though they want a "nice girl" to take home to mom.

If a person is looking for a RELATIONSHIP, they usually look for a nice person who treats them well and cares about them. If they are looking for something to "play with," bring on the Barbie dolls and the Fonz.Actually, I dated a girl who wound up being a stripper, but was a co-worker at the big T with me at the time. She was cute-ish (actually, looked like a shorter Kelly Pickler, just not quite as stunning...same accent though). It wasn't a looks thing, though, she was cool as hell. There have been co-workers I've had who are/were absolutely gorgeous and totally deficient in social skills.

Reminder, I'm talking attitude here, not looks. You can be ugly as donkey ass and be a bad boy, and you can look like Ace "I'm so Innocent" Young and be a total nice guy, and vice versa. But don't tell me there aren't girls who don't care about looks; I call BS on that.

[Satchel]

Mynock is what girls are really looking for... I never would have guessed that :D

[Mynock]

You and me both Satch.

[Satchel]

You and me both Satch.

well good for you man!

[Patrick Shannon]

Heh heh, they'll all say nice guys but they won't really mean it. (Except Morea of course) The nice guys end up sitting home on saturday nite and the jerks who treat women like crap will have and endless supply of dates. ;)

Of course! One thing I've learned with women (and people in general) is to look at them by their actions and not what they say. They "say" they want the nice guys, but whom do you see them out with on the weekends? And why not? They're far more exciting.

But the problem is, nice guys are too sappy and boring, and bad boys are jerks and sometimes abusive in the end. So what does a guy do? You take the best winning traits of both and turn it into something :)

[morea]

They "say" they want the nice guys, but whom do you see them out with on the weekends?

what are you saying about Neuro, exactly? :p

[JPnyc]

I dunno, I think I'm reasonably nice and I haven't done so bad. I mean I don't steal, cheat or lie (generally) and would never force myself sexually on a blind person. I think that's fairly nice.

[reuber1]

I dunno, I think I'm reasonably nice and I haven't done so bad. I mean I don't steal, cheat or lie (generally) and would never force myself sexually on a blind person. I think that's fairly nice.You're a noble man, with a noble plan.

I dunno, call me jaded ("no shit :rolleyes: " goes the rest of the forum), but I've been shot down enough times to get my own legit purple heart...definitely an ice cold heart; I'll admit that past experiences have weened me from being too nice to an all around ass sometimes. Maybe it doesn't help that this is a pseudo-college town that also happens to be one of the most alcoholic cities in the country.

[Satchel]

Maybe it doesn't help that this is a pseudo-college town that also happens to be one of the most alcoholic cities in the country.

You should have better luck with all those drunk girls Reub!

[reuber1]

Don't wanna catch the mumps. ;)

[cjoe]

Well this was a thrilling read. I will now throw in my 2. I have always considered myself a quiet and nice guy, but frankly i don't really care if girls go for the confident macho guys. This sounds pretty selfish but i would rather spend the time and effort doing things that i like doing because i really like doing them and because im good at them. As opposed to learning how to talk to women and give them what they want which i find - in my experience - a pointless exercise. Im not bitter, i feel i've got a lot to offer a woman but i don't feel the urge to go out and tell every woman i meet at a pub what i think she wants to hear. It is you who should be chasing me i say! Im happy doing what im doing without the distraction of modern dating.

Or maybe im a scared-weird-little-guy?

[JPnyc]

No Joe, you're quite right. Lest we forget "this above all, to thine own self, be true". I do what I want. For me it's the only way.

[shellebelle]

Well, I just unintentionally evened up the score.

For me it's the nice guys. Without the long sappy pity party, I've done my time with a-hole men (and this isn't in regards to bf/gf relationships). I'd love for a man to appreciate me for who I am and what I do, not belittle me for what I'm not. The latter really does a lot of damage to a person as they're growing up.

I had to laugh at the comment way back on the first page about how the nice guys sit at home on Saturday nights. If they'd just pick up the darn phone and call the girls they'd be having fun too! I'll admit, I sit at home most Saturdays too :( At least I'm freelancing :)

cjoe, I'm much like you. After giving it a few tries and not doing so well I just said to heck with the chasing guys around. I feel like I have a lot to offer as well and if they don't see that, then they aren't worth my time.

[morea]

you don't want me I leave clothes out everywhere and my cat farts.

show him this:

http://yellinglizard.com/wp-content/nocatfartssmall.jpg

lol. Cat farts can be deadly.

[Jeizzavelle]

Too cute! I need to post that all around so shhe might get the hint.

[Patrick Shannon]

As opposed to learning how to talk to women and give them what they want which i find - in my experience - a pointless exercise. Im not bitter, i feel i've got a lot to offer a woman but i don't feel the urge to go out and tell every woman i meet at a pub what i think she wants to hear. It is you who should be chasing me i say! Im happy doing what im doing without the distraction of modern dating.

That's so right on, man, and good for you.

I think that's where a lot of nice guys ultimately fail, they're always saying what their date likes to hear and giving in to their (every) whim, and it becomes so boring and predictable and they get stepped on. Kind of a weird example...about a few months ago, a girl stood me up on a date and left a message afterwards giving a really lame reason that borderlined on the "I had to wash my hair" excuse, at any rate, one that absolutely didn't stop her from contacting me to inform me well ahead of time.

Second class behavior is something I never tolerate from dates very early on, because in my opinion, there's always someone better around the corner that will treat you right, not to mention it's far easier to weed out bad people very early on. I decided to just ignore her and not bother calling her back.

Oddly enough, sometime later after the silent treatment she ended up calling me and with a sweet demeanor, wondered where I've been and if I was up to anything that week. I bluntly told her that I was busy and had to go, I had a date ;) I thought that would infuriate her and get me off the hook, but I ended up bumping into her at a party later on and she was trying to be charming to me the rest of the night (while I wouldn't give her the time of day). I always wondered how weird that was, but when I told a friend about it, he simply said "You put Princess in her place."


I had to laugh at the comment way back on the first page about how the nice guys sit at home on Saturday nights. If they'd just pick up the darn phone and call the girls they'd be having fun too!

A lot of times, it's not that they're sitting at home on Friday/Saturday nights, but that they don't ever make it past the first few dates ;)

[Patrick Shannon]

Ah, finally found it. Basically all a person has to do is do everything that is opposite to this guy and things will be fine :D

http://www.purevolume.com/troysmixtapeoflove

[reuber1]

Ah, finally found it. Basically all a person has to do is do everything that is opposite to this guy and things will be fine :D

http://www.purevolume.com/troysmixtapeofloveOMFG, I remember that! Evidently, she dumped him three weeks later.

[Patrick Shannon]

Three days ;)

[reuber1]

Three something, I'm surprised it wasn't the three (five?) minutes of listening to that song that didn't make her run to begin with.

[balou]

LOL! Poor guy will never live that one down. I had to quit listening cuz it was making me nautious.