Campaign logo & Flier

[DesignerScott]

Hey everyone,
Here's a campaign flier that I made for someone I knew running for office.
They ended up backing out of the race (no harm to me though) before these actually got printed, but I was hoping for some feedback anyway, so that I could still learn some more for next time.
Project Details. 4.25" x 11.5" front/back. Text wasn't quite nailed down yet, and that was going to be his signature, not a lame font, but the logo was finalized, and the color scheme.
http://www.votemccauley.com/flier.jpg

[Eraser Nubbin]

I like the sky background throughout. The front looks a little empty to me, maybe if the pic on the front was larger, tighter on the guy. Maybe his slogan could be a little bigger as well.

The white text may be hard to read over some of those clouded areas, it is kind of tough to tell at this %.

[orkaknos12]

The signature looks like a font.. pretty insincere.. if he has a crap signature, I'd just drop that element and reduce the amount of copy. THe plane logo mark is poorly executed.

-Jon

[DesignerScott]

and that was going to be his signature, not a lame font
You were the kind of person who grew up reading nothing but the picture books huh?
and what do you mean by poorly executed? He insisted on having the plane be a minor part of the logo.
reduce the amount of copy I did! And compared to most campaign pieces, this one is extremely brief!
Thanks for the help eraser, or can I just call you nubbin?

Maybe his slogan could be a little bigger as well
I really wasn't sure about this one! On one hand I tried to make sure that everything had a lot of space, because I think that people these days get so inundated with information that having a significant amount of white space on everything would actually help everything stand out more.
But maybe that's just because I'm a prepress guy and all I ever hear is "make our logo bigger", and "as big as possible!"
maybe if the pic on the front was larger, tighter on the guy yah, my initial thought on that was that people might not recognize that he was a pilot, but duh! the flight suit probably gives it away more! (Stupid ME!)
The white text may be hard to read over some of those clouded areas, it is kind of tough to tell at this %
Yah, it is kind of iffy, and I probably would have/ am going to finish it off with a real subtle drop shadow, maybe in blue to help with that.

[orkaknos12]

the plane looks like a flying thumbtack.. maybe drop the rear engines? okay I'm glad you're changing the signature. What I meant by reduce the copy is use the same amount of space to say more. you used a whole line to write "personal statement" and stuff like the word "united airlines pilot" in point form. I don't know how many people will care about their candidate's flying history without immediately tying it to his candidacy in the same sentence. Reduction of useless info will help greatly because you can blow up the important stuff. People are going to glance at this creative as they throw it in the garbage, you're trying to get an immediate impact.

-Jon

[erichmond]

I don't mind the front and overall I agree about having enough space around the text in-order to appeal to the reader and not look too intimidating or ugly to read, however, I think if you were to drop/turn the levels down on the sky background or replace the background with solid colour then the text would read a lot better. Another thing that bothers me on the back is block of text at the bottom above the ‘false signature’ (I got it!) looks a bit tight to the trim.

[typographics]

i agree with orkaknos12 in regards to the plane graphic. at first, i thought it was the profile of a water valve.

[designpunk]

is there any reason why you have broken it up with big white boxes? kind of ruins the flow from top to bottom - sky, box, sky, box, sky

You need to work on your typography & alignmnt - Why doesn't the top and back line up (shift the Ken Mcauly box on the front page up so it lines up with the first box on the back page)

[fyred1]

i...in regards to the plane graphic. at first, i thought it was the profile of a water valve.I recognized it as an A-10 immediately. I think it is easy to see that the image is a jet.

[1ooScreamingTrees]

I recognized it as an A-10 immediately.

Sounds like you have a personal interest / working knowledge of aircrafts. Most voters don't, and if an aircraft is going to be represented in this manner it needs to be represented in a much clearer manner.

As an isolated mark it is very hard to identify.

As for the rest of the brochure - I'm really not digging your bullet selection and body copy typography. It gives off the "brochure created in MS Word fill-in-the-template" vibe. You can still achieve a very subdued sense of formality with some minor variations, without pushing creative boundaries to the point where they turn off older more reserved markets (Don't the elderly have the highest voter turn-out? I forget!)