Newsletter Design

[tZ]

Allright, this is something I have decided to redo and perhaps I could get it to be worthy of existence. Anyway, I have included the origional design which was done about 4 months ago in one of my class's and the new emerging design that i am working towards now.

With that said, the goal here was/is to arrange a conplex amount of information into one cohesive unit that would appeal to the memebers or potential members of the national dodgeball league. Since, this would be their newsletter.

I was not given any images for this assignment and told they were optional. In my initial design I included some images but, in the end I don't think they were beneficial to the design therefore in the new composition I didn't include them. However, they can allways be introduced later if need be.

What I have tried to do in the new design was introduce the components of the origional that I thought were sucessful and strip it of everything else. I am also considering making it just black and white. Allthough, in the inital assignment I was required to include the two different colors in their logo at the least along with their logo but, that will prombably be introduced later as well.

One last note is that I was responsiple for creating the name but, as I stated earlier the copy was given to me and I was only allowed to make very minimal adjustments.

So any constructive critism would help as I think I am sorta hitting a roadblock with this one. As I said before I struggling with introducing color and images as I didn't really create the design with this intended and I'm not all that sure they are needed but, just be pretty. The same can be said with the color.

Well apparently the old file is to large so I can't get it to attach, I'll see what I can do about that and hopefully post it.

thanks

[Ned]

Honestly, Tz, I don't like the way you've done your blurbs. They look out-of-place, and unappealing.

[urstwile]

Honestly, tZ, I think you'll get a greater response by uploading the images to a free uploading site, like tinypic.com or image shack. I for one don't care to download anything to my hard drive unless I fully know the source.

[CkretAjint]

I for one don't care to download anything to my hard drive unless I fully know the source.

Bingo...

[John G]

Throughout: If the text was doing something else I wouldn't mind the non-distorted type, but it's just looks like it's perpective done wrong atm. Complete distortion ala regular ol' photoshop probably isn't the answer, but I think you need to add a bit of angle into some of the letter forms to get more of the effect rather than "stair stepping" type of angle thing happening now (messing up the lines).

I don't quite get the moon shapes or why they're there (plust they just sort of go away).

I think the blurbs would be more successfull and less confusing to readability if they struck through entire paragraphs and didn't stop in the middle some where.

Page two, the 2 main paragraphs gives me a 'wtf' it's completely different. One paragraph doesn't have a shape and the crescent one is just quite a change. I don't mind the change, but I think you're going to have to use it more with your grid that you established at the top of the page with the smaller paragraphs. Paragraph order also is probably going to be an issue on that page. Do you read the top 3 first or go top, bottom, middle top, middle bottom, top right, bottom right?

Page 3, again I think staying more with the pargraph grid might work better.

Page 5, formatting. There might be some other things to do to make it easier to read as a list. like more spacing/letting or indented paragraphs. I'm also not terribly wild on the 'Play' and 'Rules of Play' being centered with such a strong grid colums going on.

*edit: typed that before I read your description. I still read moon more than dodge ball. And when I think ball, I think of something fairly small and not so size dominent (which could be what's leading me to the moon thing). Or maybe it just needs more filling in and less of the "I am crescent moon shape". lol

ooo idea. Dodge ball is usually played with many balls right? Well if that doesn't give you tons of repetition/patter ideas it should. So many bouncing balls (they could be stretched too).

Just not like that nut kicking 'gif that's been going around and you should be ok. =p

[tZ]

john G wrote:
Throughout: If the text was doing something else I wouldn't mind the non-distorted type, but it's just looks like it's perpective done wrong atm. Complete distortion ala regular ol' photoshop probably isn't the answer, but I think you need to add a bit of angle into some of the letter forms to get more of the effect rather than "stair stepping" type of angle thing happening now (messing up the lines).

I didn't want to distort the type and for that reason I placed each letter individually in the effort of creating a an implied atmospheric perspective based on contrast in scale. However, from what you have stated it seems that you think it would be more sucessfull if I pushed the perspective more- correct? Perhaps if I introduced color into the letters and had the cools near the back and warms in the from it might help that so I might expieriment with that since, you don't think the perspective is working. I didn't create headlines in regards to adhering to the rules of linear perspective but, atmospheric. My goal there was to have the typography look as if it has cutting through the body copy to create a feel of movement and flow rflecting a dodgeball when its thrown.

John G wrote:

don't quite get the moon shapes or why they're there (plust they just sort of go away).


I didn't belive they worked either as it stands so thats good to know. However, they are meant to represent a dodgeball. I initally was going to use them as the shadow to define the ball and also have the ball but, the ball was ommited and prombably be introduced back in now. I'm either thinking an image holder now or a texture of a dodgeball to introduce some function and form into those shapes. Right now they do look a little bit useless now that I havn't looked at in about week.

John G wrote:

I think the blurbs would be more successfull and less confusing to readability if they struck through entire paragraphs and didn't stop in the middle some where.


They are meant to be the headlines of the stories. I did this so they would appear as if they were penetrating through.However, why do you think they would be more sucessfull if they struck through the entire column(s) of copy?

John G wrote:

Page two, the 2 main paragraphs gives me a 'wtf' it's completely different. One paragraph doesn't have a shape and the crescent one is just quite a change. I don't mind the change, but I think you're going to have to use it more with your grid that you established at the top of the page with the smaller paragraphs. Paragraph order also is probably going to be an issue on that page. Do you read the top 3 first or go top, bottom, middle top, middle bottom, top right, bottom right?


Initally, that is how all the paragraphs were- constrained to the modular grid. However, in my estasy I decided it would be different and unique to break up each line and make them appear as if they are part of the ball flying through the air. I'm not so sure of my decision either at this point but, are you saying the copy is unreadable/difficult to read or is the appraoch just "different" and thats why you say its not really "working"- cause it doesn't coher with profesional and usual practice of layout out columns of copy?

John G wrote:

Page 5, formatting. There might be some other things to do to make it easier to read as a list. like more spacing/letting or indented paragraphs. I'm also not terribly wild on the 'Play' and 'Rules of Play' being centered with such a strong grid colums going on.


yeah… neither am I anymore. I think what needs to be done is I need to break up each line of copy in the list like I did with all subsequent pages and amend the kerning, tracking and leading manually becasue right now it isn't creating a conistent whole with the rest of pages. The placement of the subheadings will also need to bethought as you suggested which I agree.

Ned wrote:

Honestly, Tz, I don't like the way you've done your blurbs. They look out-of-place, and unappealing.


really- why? Is it becasue they are unreadable or just a personal taste type thing?- Is it that they don't stand line with the rest of boring headline placement out there? honestly, I would really like to know.

- thanks everyone for your feedback it might be a while before I get back to this as I have no current access to the software until school starts again in the fall. So I might update this thread then sometimes. Otherwise thanks for all your comments.