Self Promo PC

[Derfie]

I put together this Post Card, to send out to companies, printers, agencies etc. to advertise my business. I would appreciate honest and constructive feedback in regards to the design. Thanks!

http://img441.imageshack.us/img441/3981/hbapc2008pg1zz3.th.jpg (http://img441.imageshack.us/my.php?image=hbapc2008pg1zz3.jpg)http://img524.imageshack.us/img524/391/hbapc2008pg2wz3.th.jpg (http://img524.imageshack.us/my.php?image=hbapc2008pg2wz3.jpg)

[Oldat29]

Im not great at crit, and im a student, BUT.

I like the feel of it, it relaxes me.?

I realy like the use of white space.

[CurtisS]

This looks nice and has generous white space. The hummingbird graphic is excellent!
Have you tried increasing character spacing (the technical term for this escapes me at the moment)? The text looks a bit compressed. Also consider adding one one your best design examples to the back of the card.

[CkretAjint]

Honest opinion...

Front of the card:

Blowing your logo up huge on the front of the postcard in no way excites me or motivates me to call you to do business for me (if I were the printer). I can have one of my in-house guys do that in 2 minutes.

The Hummingbird has some raggedy/odd curves to it that should be cleaned up some. Especially if you are blowing it up larger.

On the back:

The long paragraph on top compared to the shorter on on the bottom feel odd together. They should both be short. Maybe add a dividing line vertical down the car dot separate the address/stamp area to the rest. I would move your return address on the other side of this line as well.

"collabrated" is hyphenated.

The space after commas and periods feels WAY tight in the lower paragraph, almost non-existent.

[CkretAjint]

Have you tried increasing character spacing (the technical term for this escapes me at the moment)?

Kerning. ;)

[CurtisS]

Kerning. ;)

Bingo! Thanks.:)

[Derfie]

Thanks for all the comments so far! The hummingbird is a big part of my company image, so I think it's appropriate to have it featured, on the front, in a simple and clean manner.

I have made some changes on the back, and reposted.
[/URL][URL="http://img87.imageshack.us/my.php?image=hbapc2008pg2fg4.jpg"]http://img87.imageshack.us/img87/8879/hbapc2008pg2fg4.th.jpg (http://img137.imageshack.us/my.php?image=hbapc2008pg2kr4.jpg)

[budafist]

The back is bland for my tastes.

How about putting the logo watermarked where the stamp goes?

[Navian]

...The Hummingbird has some raggedy/odd curves to it that should be cleaned up some. Especially if you are blowing it up larger...

I agree. I can see alot of inconsistancies with the curves.

[PrintDriver]

It's not one for the bulletin board, but it isn't offensive in any way.
What would make someone keep this postcard on hand? It wouldn't fit in a BC book and I don't know many who keep postcards unless they go on the wall for some good reason...

The only objection I can see is the hyphenation noted above and maybe some flattened curves in the bird in places. Can't tell without the line art being selected.

[budafist]

On the basis that you are handing these out to people within our industry and not to the general public, these postcards really need to be AMAZING and will need to WOW your target if they are going to be kept.

I work in a print company and we print some beautiful stuff. I have to say, this postcard wouldn't make it past reception.

[CkretAjint]

On the basis that you are handing these out to people within our industry and not to the general public, these postcards really need to be AMAZING and will need to WOW your target if they are going to be kept.

That's what I meant when I said:

Blowing your logo up huge on the front of the postcard in no way excites me or motivates me to call you to do business for me...

[PrintDriver]

I think Aquent's postcard is the only designer source on the B-Board right now. It's been there for years cuz it was very clever. And it's very soft and furry. Really. It is!

Most others are image companies or print vendor outsources with excellent imagery.

Perhaps, while this card is tasteful in some ways, maybe it isn't what you should use to approach printers when looking for possible overflow or referrals. Sometimes we're even more visual than your clients. You wouldn't believe the scrutiny a postcard gets when it comes in. Registration, color choices, image resolution...

[Danger_Mouse]

Hummingbird....great concept. I don't mind the image of either, but with such swooping flowing motion going on in the image, it isn't executed well to flow everything else into it. As already said...it looks like a "make my logo bigger" casualty, or just flopped in as a background. At least off center it or something.

There is also a space before "individual needs". Stood out like a sore thumb.** just saw your repost...corrected**
While I am a fan of clean minimalistic designs, this is lacking.

On the basis that you are handing these out to people within our industry and not to the general public, these postcards really need to be AMAZING and will need to WOW your target if they are going to be kept.
totally, and this current design is not there yet. I would work with this more, I think it could be a really good piece.

Again love the hummingbird concept.

[urstwile]

Kerning. ;)
Actually, it would be tracking. ;) Kerning is for individual pairs, tracking is for overall letterspacing.

[tZ]

I agree with the comments made about the hummingbird. The curves making up the illustration should be perfect without extraneous anchors and asymmetric anchor handles.

From a macro perspective I agree with budafist – I'd probably throw it away. Its not very interesting and looks like everything else out there. Nothing really stands out or sparks curiosity. Thats not to say its a decent composition but as far as interest goes – I don't think its there yet.

[CkretAjint]

Actually, it would be tracking. ;) Kerning is for individual pairs, tracking is for overall letterspacing.

In all fairness he did say character (as in 1). I would have suggested tracking for characters. :p

[Derfie]

Thanks for all the comments, they are really helpful. I am more of a fine artist, so my logo and other design work has been to appeal to clientel looking for that type of work, (Portraits, pet portraits, and children's art/drawing lessons.) I realize that to appeal to the graphic industry, I need to step it up a notch. I will work it out some more and repost soon.

Thanks again for the constructive critisim.

[budafist]

I think you are better off to send a brochure with samples of your work in it than a postcard that really doesn't tell the target what style you work in.

You are selling yourself short trying to push your art services without actually showing off your art.

[frankster]

Why not forget the computer entirely (until you need to scan and sent to print) and just draw your postcard in pen and ink. I would love to see something organic and hand drawn looking.

For example, I love the way these images are hand drawn pen on napkins and not computer drawn flourishes bought from Istock. It gives them uniqueness, skill and a whole different beauty. It makes them feel precious...

http://www.sgr.kiev.ua/img/1189497176.jpg

http://www.sgr.kiev.ua/

If art is what you are good at then show then make your advertising art.