Experimental Work

[Markasin3]

This is a very quick piece I did, and when I say quick.. I mean quick. Like 15 minutes. I'm interested in knowing what you guys think in an attempt to better understand my design skills, because I'm pretty clueless. I just kinda work of intuition. Let me know the good, the bad, and the ugly. Is this good design or bad design? thank!

http://i421.photobucket.com/albums/pp300/Markasin3/Picture1.png?t=1264909710

[Silent$nake]

I like the design "Whats going on" could be bigger but good work =D

[sscottcreative]

reminds me a bit of Saul Bass (http://http://images.google.com/images?client=safari&rls=en&q=saul%20bass&oe=UTF-8&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&hl=en&tab=wi)..

[Roth]

It's so Bass-like i'd say you're not really working from intuition, more creating a pastiche. At the moment it's nothing much, a little abstract piece, hardly design at all, because you're not really communicating anything. It looks like it took 15 minutes because it doesn't have a great deal of thought or depth. What you need is something to focus the design on. Come up with a concept for something you like and make a poster for that.

[Markasin3]

Thank you Roth and sscottcreative. Yes, I know who Saul Bass is, and I knew it was looking a lot like his style. I really appreciate that you told me its not displaying a real message. That's important.

What about the spacing and placements of the elements?

[Bob]

I see the intro to Rocky and Bullwinkle.

[shmoo]

The letters in the black boxes become less centred as the word moves down. I don't know what else to comment on because I'm really not sure what the piece means or is intended to do...and I am terrible at commenting on art for arts sake :p

[Markasin3]

okay. Here's what I did today. Critique this.

http://i421.photobucket.com/albums/pp300/Markasin3/experimentation%20pieces/graphicdesignorderup3-01.jpg

[Buda]

There is some weird kerning issues in the bottom line of text. The fonts that you've used are really random and don't suit the illustration. Rosewood and Zapfino are really distinct typefaces – you should learn when it is appropriate to use them.

[Markasin3]

Okay, Thanks. I guess I chose different fonts in an attempt to show that commercialism uses many typefaces. But looking at it now, it just looks sloppy. I decided to use the type inside the burger and on the fries for all of them.

What else?

[seamas]

The lighting/shadow and color is off.
There seems to be "disagreement" as to where the light is coming from. Define the light source.

In general, the colors are just a tad too high key. I understand a conceptual reasoning to do this, but having ALL of them high-key makes it look amateurish. Perhaps a more neutral color for the background.

The paper needs to be made slightly gray. Plus the perspective is off on the horizontal lines.
Perhaps having the perspective as such is too forced. maybe have the paper skewed a little -so it's not to symetrical to the page.

[CMYK girl]

I see the intro to Rocky and Bullwinkle.

LMAO

I saw it too.

[Markasin3]

version 2

http://i421.photobucket.com/albums/pp300/Markasin3/experimentation%20pieces/graphicdesignorderup5.jpg

[Skdisplays]

Good idea.
Nice work.

[hank_scorpio]

As far as packaging design goes, it's very plain. How about adding more graphical elements to the packaging?

I think the type is bit small on the cup and is completely different to that on the fries holder.

Not a bad start, but it needs more design implemented to the packaging, I think.

[Markasin3]

Okay, yea! I like these suggestions. I'll work on the packaging soon enough. Here's another one that I worked on today. This one is actually going in my dad's blog. (http://worldtidbits.blogspot.com/)
How does this look?
http://i421.photobucket.com/albums/pp300/Markasin3/experimentation%20pieces/dinosauroil2-01.jpg

[Abe_PixlPerfect]

Im not sure what the notebook paper is for on the food design and it doesnt seem to fit or frame the other articles and items in the piece very well, the dino design is a cool idea. What were you trying to convey on the dino work?

[Markasin3]

My dad started an informative blog which will soon become it's own website one day. One of his entries is entitled "Did oil come from dinosaurs?". (http://worldtidbits.blogspot.com/) This is the first illustration he asked me to make for his entry.

[Guy Cornet]

Roth is spot on. You need to communicate something, and let the design follow what you are trying to say. The design will come from the concept. Dont grab design tools willy nilly, and put them on the page because it will look scrappy and wont communicate well. Are you trying to get a modern art piece or create good graphic communications? They are too massively different things. Come up with your concept, and also people dont research these days. look at people who are doing what you like, and copy them. learn there styles, and then move what you have learnt into something individual, and make it your own... Experiment...

Dont mean to sound grumpy, but you need to push yourself.

[Markasin3]

Guy Cornet, thank you for your input, but I'm lost. When I push myself, it usually ends up becoming more random. I'm not quite sure of which direction to push. Is the dinosaur in the oil container not communicating anything?

Better yet, could you give me an example of what you believe is good communication design and tell me why it works.

I like what Roth told me, and I'm trying to take it to heart.

[Silent$nake]

lol under the little catch phrase u should put "do u want frys with that"

[Markasin3]

The reason I made a graphic design fast food meal is because I was trying to compare the two.
Graphic Designers will get what you want done a lot faster.
We are at your service.
But also know, if you want something super fast, it'll be less nutritious for you. Give us more time, and you might have a gourmet meal.

By the way, the first piece i created might be connecting to 9/11. Even though it's a poor design, it has a little meaning. I think subconsciously, I was thinking about 9/11. I used square shapes, because buildings are tall and square, but a round curvy shape in the right, because planes are curvy and its out of place. But also, this plane has a very sharp point, like a needle. To make it threatening. A lightning bolt showing danger and a significant event. The white base, set at an angle because it was so tense.

[Abe_PixlPerfect]

sounds like youre stretching a bit to try and make it work. The notebook paper doesnt make any sense and the dino piece looks like hes guarding the oil, not really portraying that it is coming FROM the dinosaur. The frys idea is cool but I would use it for something else if this piece isnt working for you. When in doubt, start from square one and u will usually know when it works. But then again, its just my two cents.

[Guy Cornet]

I actually replied to the thread not looking further down the reply list Mark, and think the editorial pice with the dino is nice. However is editorial illustration going to be your thing?

Have a look at the poster series. He has done some illustrations, and self promotional work for film analogies. It might give you and Idea about semiotics.

http://www.exergian.com/