WTF do I know? I'm just an ARTIST!!!

[greyghost]

lol.
Comic relief, anyone?

Example A) for this month's deadline:
Realtor ad. Really picky lady. Sent me a photo for the background that turned out to be all of an inch wide. For a half page magazine ad. I let her know I need a larger file, and it turns out she pulled it off the Internet "and it was plenty big there, I don't understand," So I find a different house shot to put in the background (not my idea) and fade it out so the text is nice and readable.... and she wants the photo darkened. *This is proof #3, mind you, should be NO more changes at this point. So I make it darker. What do I know, I've only been adjusting photos for 8 years or more. Whatever.

Example b)
A logo - sent in low res. Of course. It's an inch and a half wide, needs to be 4 inches wide. They don't have a larger image of their new logo (????). Not only that, but in looking closely at it, the edges of the logo are spilling everywhere! They found some n00b artist to do it cheap, I'll bet.

Example C)
Massage ad. You know, nice, relaxing feel, right?
She wants FIREWORKS in the background, with a massage photo floating on top. It looks like some weird Star Wars spinoff. If I found a photo of a fat lady getting a massage, I could change the header to "Pigs in Space!" (muppets, anyone?)

Last issue she had to have a guy getting a massage. I only have one photo of a massage with a man in it - he looks like a thug, and I had to photoshop the tattoos off of him. But she loved it. Even had me make the photo bigger.

Somehow, I don't think I want a massage from this lady. Ever.

[Patrick Shannon]

Fireworks? I know the Fourth is coming up and all, but for a massage ad? That's hilarious. I am reminded of Ed Wood...

Ed Wood: How can I make you happy?

Investor: Okay. Two things. Number one: I want the movie to end with a big explosion. Sky full of smoke.

Ed Wood: Yes. But it ends with Dr. Vornoff falling into the pit.

Investor: Not any more.

[greyghost]

I actually IMed my mom on that one. She needs a good laugh these days.
I may post the final ad. I know it will look far worse after it gets proofed.

edit: I forgot to add: she is reducing the size of the ad from a cluttered 1/2 page ad to an extrememly cluttered 1/4. Because she refuses to lose a little text.

[keith1]

Jeez o pete's People are so stupid. You should let clients know that when they hire you they are hiring you're brain too. You'll come up with the ideas. Well we all need to make a buck I guess though. But anyway here's an example of a client giving me step by step orders, yes he choose gradients, bevels, strokes, drop shadows, placement of the text, and the size of everything, he just needed me to put it together on the computer. Well I'm glad he didn't like it and then gave me creative freedom to come up with my own and he loved the one I came up with on the right.

[greyghost]

Wow, Keith - that one on the right looks so much better! I wonder why.... lol.

I don't have as much clout with the magazine clients as the work is farmed out to me for this publication. I used to have more, and could say more and stop more crap, but the zine changed hands and the buyer liked my work so much he wanted to keep me, even though I have moved out of state.

[Patrick Shannon]

Your redone version is great Keith, it especially would look nice/professional in the corner of stationary (like a #10 envelope) too.