For a project in one of my studio classes, we were tasked with selecting a (design-related) text, redesigning, and redistributing it. I chose an article by Robert Arnheim that brings awareness of the importance of sensory and visual intelligence and how it’s just as crucial as cognitive intelligence and intuition, especially in the design world. Let me know what you think!
Are you asking for a critique for your work in progress video?
- Using the computerised voice is very distracting. Read it yourself or ask a friend and record it.
- Title screen too slow
- Too many empty parts, boring
- The videos don’t match the text perfectly
- Add sound effects or music because it’s weird that it’s so silent besides the text
I like the concept of bringing windows with videos.
Was the assignment to make a video?
Simply reading a long block of text isn’t usually entertaining enough to hold people’s attention. The monotonous computerized voices make it even more difficult to follow.
The opening title is weak and difficult to see or read. With short videos, if you don’t catch someone’s attention within the first few seconds, you’ve lost a big part of your audience — they just click elsewhere and leave. People’s attention spans on the internet can be very short.
I’m puzzled by your technique of the entire video being a screen capture where you’ve just dragged different windows into view. This is either very artsy or a workaround for lacking editing skills. Whatever the case, I’ve not seen it done before. It could be sort of cool if it were a little smoother, more obviously deliberate and combined with other visuals and sounds to break things up a bit and make the piece more engaging…